#102 - Say Something

Today’s words: Candle, Rash, Clown, Turf

Word count: 844

Completion time: 48 minutes

Summary: It’s easy to joke about rape, it’s even easier to be a rape apologist, but if you don’t say something...all you’re doing is saying it’s okay.

TW: mentions of sexual assault

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Based on a true story...

The first time, it was whilst you were playing a video game:

“Man, I am raping you so hard right now! I own you, man!”

“Hey shut up, I’m just out of practice...”

“You’re on my turf now and you’re about to die. Take that!”

The second time, you were on your way home from a club:

“Oh man, stop being such a... a....”

“A what?”

“I dunno, a clown.”

“Haha, what? You see a red nose and a big bow tie? I’m being serious. Wouldn’t you want to touch a girl if they were wearing a short skirt? Come on, you know they want it, I’ve seen the way they dance. That’s what grinding means – they want your dick, so you give it to them.”

The third time, you were watching a movie:

“If a girl ever disrespected me like this bitch, I’d stick it so far up her ass she’d be tasting my cum for months.”

“If she’d even let you near her ass.”

“Like I’d let her get away, more like it.”

All innocent comments. Neil would never actually do anything like that, you thought, because he was your friend...your best friend, in fact. Why would someone you have so much fun with ever do something like that? Everyone jokes, you can’t have a go at someone for a joke, no matter how offensive and misogynistic they are.

The fourth time though, that was different.

One night, Neil decided to invite everyone back to his house after a warehouse party got cancelled. It was you, Neil, Jessica, and Katie, plus some other mates that you didn’t know that well. There was only a bottle of wine in the house, so everyone made do and sucked from the same bottle all night. Not you though, you were more interested in talking to a girl that had started coming onto you.

After a few hours, the ‘party’ dispersed and only the four of you were left. Since it was getting pretty late, you all decided to go to bed – you and Neil in his room, Jessica and Katie in the spare room. All you could think about was the girl that had somehow disappeared with the rest of the party, so you spilled everything to Neil, asking him if he knew her, if he thought you had a chance with her, how goddamn pretty she was.

“Oh, will you shut up?” Neil said, getting out of bed and scratching his back. “Fucking rash... Listen, I’m gonna see how the girls are doing so just go to sleep, okay?”

In the morning, you were woken by a feminine voice shouting in the next room, shortly followed by Neil’s voice. Confused and not quite awake, you stayed in bed and listened to what they were shouting about. All you could figure out was that Neil had done something bad that the girl was angry about. Typical really, you thought.

When the shouting was over, a door slammed shut and Neil came into the bedroom again.

“What was that about? Who was that?” you asked.

Neil waved his hand in the air as if to dismiss the inquiry. “Just Nadine. Christ...”

“What did you do?”

“You know Katie? I ended up in bed next to her, touched her a bit, and now they’re all angry.” He started pacing up and down the room, kicking at the rug.

“What do you mean?”

“I had Nadine banging on my front door at eight in the morning because Katie had texted her about it.”

“Why was she so angry?”

“Frigid or whatever. I can tell when a girl wants it, can’t I? So this really isn’t my fault.”

It took a while before it clicked. “How...how did you know she wanted it?”

“I just knew!”

You stopped talking. You knew exactly what had happened, but you didn’t want to talk about it anymore. Neil was your oldest friend, he was a good guy deep down, you assured yourself...and plus, did that really even count as...? You waved the word away like you were blowing out a candle.

If Neil got in trouble over it, you’d lose your best friend, so everyone had to keep quiet, especially Katie.

What the fuck is wrong with you? You really picked your rapist friend over a girl who had been touched without consent? He knows that he got away with that, and he knows that he could probably do it again to someone else. You really chose your own feelings over those of any number of girls he could assault?

This is one of the reasons why things like that don’t get reported; it isn’t always because the victim is too scared to speak up, it’s because people don’t want others to get in trouble so they do what you did – beg the girl not to say anything more.

Have some sympathy, you say, look at it from his shoes, you say. What about her shoes? Or do they not matter? Do the other potential victims not matter?

Think about it. Speak up.